


Light & Shadow

by Saoirse Mooney (achuislemochroi)



Series: Narniafic [36]
Category: Chronicles of Narnia - All Media Types, Chronicles of Narnia - C. S. Lewis
Genre: Angst, M/M, POV Lucy Pevensie, Rating is for Themes, Reaction to Trauma, Setting: Dawn Treader
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-02
Updated: 2017-08-02
Packaged: 2018-12-10 09:58:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,128
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11689293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/achuislemochroi/pseuds/Saoirse%20Mooney
Summary: You didn’t know what was happening, until it was almost too late.  But it’s strange what a near-death experience can teach you about people you thought you knew.





	Light & Shadow

**Author's Note:**

> Filmverse, although the encounter with the Sea Serpent is in its bookverse setting. This happens in the same timeline as, and is a direct sequel to, _A Matter Of Life And Death_.

Because you're busy, clear on the other side of the ship using the Cordial to help crew members who had shipped injuries while helping to deal with the Sea Serpent, you don’t know what’s happening. Or at least, not at the beginning. The last you’d heard of your cousin, he was sulking below deck. And your brother, you suspect, is with Caspian. You’ve noticed the two of them seem to gravitate towards each other and, although you can’t understand why they need to spend so much time in each other’s company, you suppose it’s not surprising. If you were in Ed’s position, with the alternative being spending more time than necessary with Eustace, you think you’d choose Caspian too.

It’s near impossible to separate a single man’s shout of pain from the cacophony, so there’s no reason for you to even suspect anything out of the ordinary until you find Drinian himself at your side seeking your attention.

‘Your Majesty.’

‘What is it, Drinian? Can’t it wait? I’m a bit busy at the mo—’ Drinian interrupts, something hitherto unheard of, and that’s your first warning something’s not right.

‘King Caspian sent me here with orders to retrieve your Majesty, and the Cordial, as soon as possible.’ Something twists inside you at this; the Caspian you know wouldn’t take the Cordial away from those who might need it. Not without an excellent reason. And then Drinian continues. ‘Your Majesty’s brother, King Edmund—’

You feel sick. _No. Not Ed. Not again._

‘Bring me to him. _Now_ , Drinian.’ He nods, and the two of you move off at speed.

You hear Caspian before you get to him.

When you and Drinian at last reach Caspian he’s on the deck with an unconscious Ed in his arms, clinging to him and begging him not to leave him. Caspian’s reaction to what’s going on appears to be, well, _out of proportion_ to you, for want of a better way to describe it. But you’re too busy scrabbling for the Cordial to give any thought to why he’s reacting that way or what it might mean. You coax a drop of Cordial out of its bottle and down Ed’s throat, and you can hear it working; you’re close enough to Ed to hear his breathing start up again.

When you've seen enough to satisfy yourself Ed is now sleeping, and nothing more sinister than that, you let out a sigh of relief and turn to say as much to Caspian. But the words die unspoken, and you stare open-mouthed as Caspian buries his face in Ed’s hair and bursts into tears, rocking the pair of them back and forth. You can hear muffled words through the sobbing and you approach him with caution. It’s soon obvious you’re the last thing on his mind.

‘Ed,’ you hear him croak, his tone plaintive and his voice cracking. ‘Ed, love, I thought – I thought ...’ and with this, everything at last becomes clearer. What had earlier seemed to you an over-reaction now makes far more sense now you have this new information, and it puts a different spin on Ed’s and Caspian’s reasons for being so keen to seek each other’s company. When you think about it, you realise everyone’s general dislike of Eustace’s stubborn intransigence gave Ed and Caspian a cover story no-one would even think to question.

While moving out of the way, you think about where to put Ed while he recovers.

‘We can’t leave him in that hammock,’ you say with the confidence brought to you from years of experience with battles and their casualties. ‘He'll fall out of it, likely as not, before he’s properly well again and _that_ will never do. And I don’t suppose there’s any point in trying to move Eustace from that bunk of his; it’ll never work, for one thing, and it’s barely bigger than the hammock as it is. Not to mention there’s too many stairs to be climbing up and down all the time. No, I reckon the best place we have is the Royal Cabin.’

Caspian mutters something that might be agreement. He seems to have pulled himself together a little, possibly because he has the evidence of his own eyes that Ed is still alive. But he refuses to let go of Ed.

‘Caspian,’ you say, as pragmatic as ever but attempting a gentle tone, ‘the quicker we can get Ed into a proper bed, the better. You can even bring him there yourself if you’re so inclined.’

The message seems to get through, and Caspian lets go of Ed long enough to get himself up off the ground. You notice, however, how his eyes never leave Ed for long.

Once you’re both ready, a grim-faced Caspian gently gathers the still-sleeping Ed up in his arms and carries him across the deck and up the stairs to the Royal Cabin. Once inside Caspian lays Ed on the bed, making sure he’s covered with blankets and counterpane to keep him warm and comfortable, and orders everyone else out. You’re about to argue the point, because surely as Ed’s sister you too have every right to stay with Ed, but your words go unsaid for the second time that day as you catch sight of Caspian’s face.

The strain written across him is easy to see, if only in his pinched facial expression. But when you meet his eyes you see they are burning, full to the brim with an emotion you choose not to name. Then he breaks eye contact with you, and you watch as he turns to look across to where Ed is sleeping. The sudden change in his expression to one of anguished tenderness leaves you deciding not to argue with him. Instead, feeling as if you’re interrupting something you shouldn’t, you move towards the door intent on leaving the two alone.

Caspian, who remains so engrossed in Ed he doesn’t realise he still has an audience, nearly collapses to his knees beside the bed where Ed is. He leans forward, and you watch with your heart in your mouth as he brushes a gentle kiss over Ed’s forehead before taking one of Ed’s hands in his own.

And the last thing you see is Caspian – on his knees, his shoulders shaking and his head buried in his arms – clinging to Ed as if the idea of letting go is more than he can stand.

Caspian, who you see so clearly now is in love with Ed even though you know there’s no way Ed can stay with him here in Narnia. Today’s events are but a taste of the pain still in store for Caspian; as the door closes behind you with a soft click, you wonder how he’ll bear it.


End file.
